IDKWYGWT!?: Top 5 Reasons Why Shingeki no Kyojin Doesn’t Deserve Anime of the Year

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I don’t know if you know this, but I never really cared this much about the mainstream anime scene. Partly because I never liked the mainstream.

I’ve only seen Naruto: Shippuden, I’ve never watched an episode of Bleach and I dropped One Piece after Skypeia’s arc. That being said, I don’t particularly care about the Dragon Ball series either… because it’s the Dragon’s Balls (laughtrack).

One particular anime, however, has caught my interest. A little known title called Shingeki no Kyojin, or Attack on Titan to you folk who can’t read Japanese. I didn’t really care for it at first, but then I caught wind of it because one of the characters, Mikasa Ackerman, was kinda cute and I thought I’d watch the show just for her.

Don’t judge me, I will end you.

6 episodes in I dropped it for a while because I stopped being interested… that and the main character died (spoilers but hey you had a year to watch the show). Then a friend of mine told me to give it a chance, because it got ‘super cool’ during the middle part. So I did and saw it all the way, and thus you notice why I DIDN’T put this on my Hummingbird at all. The anime is too clustered, too unoriginal and too… well, to put it in better terms, boring.

So how does THIS get a fan following of over 8 million people, just slightly less than SAO did? And it’s being touted as 2013’s Anime of the Year? No, please, don’t. Let’s talk about this, all right?

Here’s FIVE REASONS why Shingeki no Kyojin doesn’t deserve Anime of the Year.

5) Pacific Rim (and just about anything else) did it better

When it comes to humans vs monster animes, Attack on Titan can make it up there, but it falls short to classic shows like Ultraman, or the more recent Pacific Rim. You can argue that, yes, it’s a bit unfair to compare an anime to a big-budget film like Pacific Rim, but I still think AoT just falls short to other human vs monster conflicts.

Granted, the Jaegers (Haha, get it) are giant robots built to combat the monsters, but it only required 2 people to brain link into that giant robot. AoT had an ARMY of people jumping and faffing about with their little 3-dimensional movement gears trying to aim for the back of the neck.

Dante could just down, down, special behind a titan and helm break it easily. So why are these kids having so much trouble killing one titan? Not to mention, everyone is DYING.

4) Forgettable characters

If you could sing a Christmas Carol with the names of the entire Attack on Titan cast, I’ll give you a gold star because everyone in the AoT cast sucked in one way or the other. Eren was just a vengeful idiot, Mikasa is an emotionless woman who wants to get in Eren’s pa— I mean protect Eren, Rivaille… oh we’ll get to you later. And that’s pretty much all I can remember. The rest of the cast just disappeared to me, especially bloody Armin. You’d think I’d remember a mop of hair like that, but I just bloody hate the guy.

Okay, there WAS one character that I remember for all the wrong reasons. Sasha Braus.

3) Awful Pacing

Trust me when I say that this show left me in awe, but for all the wrong reasons. 99% of the time, I just felt lost about what’s happening. “OH SHIT A TITAN” “wait, why are we back to this?” “Wait, what about the damn Titan that’s about to destroy the wall again?”

Half the bloody time, the pacing was awful. That is all I need to say.

2) People die when they are killed and somehow they revive being able to control Titans… wot?

We have a problem. Everyone’s, you know, dying all over the place, you’ve got the extras, you’ve got the people who you have real concerned, Eren’s dead but then he revives and can transform into a Titan… which makes absolutely no f*cking sense whatsoever and has to be the dumbest plot point I’ve ever had to see in my entire life. This is coming from the guy who hasn’t bothered to read the manga.

I mean, come on, you’re making this easy for me to go straight back to Pacific Rim and telling you that they did this WAY better. Except, well, the lots of people dying part.

I think the only part I liked about Attack on Titan was when Eren’s mother got eaten.

1) The Fans

I cannot stress this fact ENOUGH. If the fans are a large conglomerate of anime, then Shingeki no Kyojin fans are the biggest retards in the universe.

Now, I’m not flaming, but they make it SO. EASY.

Not to mention, this will kill Cosplay as we know it. I’ve been to a recent event called Anime Festival Asia. What do I see? 90% of cosplayers being people from Shingeki no Kyojin. Why? Has Cosplay lost its uniqueness thanks to this anime? The fans themselves worship this anime like it’s the 2nd coming of Jesus. If you even SAY you don’t like this anime, they will be all over you like hounds.

Basically these are my top 5 reasons why this anime doesn’t deserve anime of the year. The characters suck, the story sucked, the art style sucked, a lot of things sucked. Honestly, just stay away from this anime.

LLLLLLLET’S STOP.

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